Moving Toward What Matters
Slow sundays, holding the AND, the courage and self belief to keep going
I love Sundays at home. I really bloody love them. Do you?
It’s the only day of the week to catch up on sleep and not need to play sergeant to get us all somewhere at a certain time. It’s my day to hermit and ease off the accelerator just a bit.
As a highly sensitive person and Projector 6/2 in human design, quieter and slower days are critical for my nervous system and wellbeing. Sure, there’s always plenty to do - washing, cooking, tidying, planning, ironing school uniforms, organising - but there’s a subtle spaciousness I can revel in, if I choose to.
Our family went for a lovely long river walk this morning - the first time we’ve done it all together since living in this rental house right near it. I feel so happy at these times. Moving my able body, in nature, with the people and animals I love most in the world. Free, safe, healthy, together. What more could I ask for. ❤️
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The photo of me below is the face of a woman in her PJs at 11:15pm Tuesday night who had just finished re-writing and polishing her detailed book proposal to send to publishers.
I’m not sure how this smiles looks to you from the outside but right then I was feeling satisfied, proud and exhausted-regrettable about the irritable, stressed, witch-ish version I’d been to my family during the afternoon and evening in order to finish it.
The light and the dark together, always. Always the and. Following my dream and feeling like I’m letting my family down. I know you’ll understand this, ladies.
I don’t think the quagmire of mixed feelings goes away entirely, not for me at least, but I believe we learn to hold the and more lightly. To not beat ourselves around the head so much. To say to ourselves: it wasn’t perfect tonight but it was good enough, we got through. I remind myself that what’s important to me matters too and we start a new day afresh in the morning.
It takes so much self belief to keep showing up for what matters and that landed for me again this week.
The book proposal, the business dream, the health goal, the community project, the home renovation, the wishes we have for our children - whatever it is we’re holding close to our hearts - requires bucket loads of self belief if we are to consistently press forward toward it in the face of doubt, fear, limiting beliefs, competing commitments, societal standards, the stories we tell ourselves… everything that can be perceived as a barrier.
To say this matters to me requires such courage. I see you, courageous woman.
“Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, ‘I will try again tomorrow.’”
- Mary Anne Radmacher
This week I listened to Hollywood actor Jeremy Renner’s audiobook memoir My Next Breath, read by Jeremy. You know how I love a good biography and more than that, I love a compelling story of overcoming adversity. This was both.
I was intrigued to listen to it after learning of Jeremy’s horrific accident being run over by his snow plough in January 2023. As well as recounting the accident (including dying and coming back 🥴) he shares his recovery journey and the profound personal transformation he’s undergone as a result.
“The love is what took over. If I had nothing to come back for, I wouldn't have come back. I came back for that love.”
— Jeremy Renner, My Next Breath
His memoir is a testament to the human spirit and its capacity to endure, evolve, and find purpose in the face of unimaginable adversity.
Hearing the emotion in Jeremy’s voice was both harrowing and moving. Love is one of my core values so I felt deeply connected to Jeremy’s messages on love that he weaves throughout his book. Might be one for you too!
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What I’m...
Listening to: See above. 😊
Reading: This week I’m getting back to Girl, Stop Apologizing by Rachel Hollis. There’s some nice encouragement in it.
Thinking About: As of today: the week ahead. What my goals are, what’s in my calendar, what we’re eating, who has what on and who needs to be where, when. I live by my Google Calendar and G-Suite!
Loving: Saturday night campfires at home. Last night we had hamburgers and chicken burgers for dinner and damper, golden syrup and ice cream for dessert. Precious, slow, family time outside under the stars. Nature has been a theme for me this week. 🍃
Not Loving: Flies! 🪰 Where did they come from and why are they here!? Honestly, they are driving me batty! I’m not used to this many flies at this time of year! Does anyone have a natural fly deterrent for in the kitchen, apart from a fly swat?
Well, friends, go well this week!
May you continue dipping into your courageous soul to keep openly giving and receiving love and moving toward what lights you up.
With love,
Benita x